I am back, with a vengeance.
It’s been quite some time since I last posted on the website. I apologize for the many many months of absence, I hope that you will all forgive me and continue coming back for updates as I plan on updating the site at least once a week from now on.
The good news is, the reason I haven’t been able to update the site is that business has been booming! For any of those who know me, you know that I’m in real estate and most people in real estate have not been doing well. Things for me have been so busy that I literally had no time.
Been so busy was quite an interesting experience, at times there was so much work to do that I wanted to just give it up, but I couldn’t, I really care for my clients and I wanted to make sure that I was doing the very best job possible for them.
You may be asking yourself, “What does this have to do with happiness?” My experience of this past year has shown me a few things and reiterated a few things to me that I already believed, when I began the site I was almost broke, but I was happy, I was able to sleep well at night and I knew that even if I didn’t have a lot of money that I had other things in my life that bring happiness. Like my family, and good friends, and of course music. Oftentimes we look at our life and we may blame external circumstances for why we feel that, oftentimes we blame the fact that we have no money for our being sad. Sometimes it even seems like there is nothing to be happy about. One thing I found out this past year is that it doesn’t matter how much money you have, I went from having nothing, to having more than I have ever had before in my life. And oddly enough I think back to the final months before business picked up and I realize that those were some of my happiest memories from this year.
And that I guess is the point, sometimes we spend all of our days wishing that things were different, we wish for something else, more money, a different family, may be an entirely different life. But what you have is all you have to work with, and if you spend your life constantly hoping that conditions around you will change, it will likely appear that they never do.
Happiness truly comes from inside you, it doesn’t come from anything outside, it comes from your heart. I’ve said it before and I will say it again, happiness is not something that you attain, it’s something that you are.
Yours In Happiness,
Keith
Filed under Self Improvement and Mastery | Tags: contentment, enthusiasm, get happy now, happiness, happy life, inner peace, long term success, love, self improvement | Comment (0)Are you ready to be happy?
From time to time my 3 year old son Noah asks me to read to him from my “boring book” which is often whatever book I am reading, when he asks me to do this he lays in bed while I read to him by the glow of his nightlight. There’s a strange part of me that thinks he’ll “get” the lessons in the books I read because at least 3 times a week I find myself reading out loud from some great books.
Last night I was reading to Noah from the classic “Think and Grow Rich” by Napoleon Hill. With this book in particular I have found it is of huge benefit to me as I read it out loud. Reading out loud gives e a chance to think even more about the words on the page and I use more of my mind comprehending what has been written. I came across a passage that seemed to jump off the page and slap me in the face. And while “Think and Grow Rich” is principally a book about generating a higher income I thought the lesson of this passage was very applicable across a wide spectrum of life experience, and notably the desire to be happy. The passage says the following;
“There is a difference between wishing for a thing and being ready to receive it.
No one is ready for a thing, until he believes he can acquire it.”
I thought about how true this is as it applies to happiness and inner peace. So many of us wander around through the day to day wishing that we could have a happier life. But it never really goes any further than that, it remains a wish, and any desire that remains a simple wish is no more effective than if you dropped a coin down a well. I believe there are people out there who wish they could be happy but deep down they don’t feel they are worthy of happiness.
In my own life I have seen this with some of my family members. My siblings and I had the unfortunate experience of losing a brother and several years later losing both of our parents within months of each other. This is not an easy situation to handle, and I must say in the moment I believe we all handled it very well. As the years pass however certain of my siblings have not been able to let go of the melancholy that often accompanies you when you lose a loved one. Sometimes it seems they “catch” themselves being happy and then experience guilt for feeling happy even though they have lost these people that are so important in their lives.
This is exactly the sort of thing that we need to overcome, until you know that you are worthy of happiness, until you know deep down inside that you deserve happiness, you are not going to be able to experience lasting happiness.
Keith
Filed under Self Improvement and Mastery | Tags: contentment, enthusiasm, get happy now, happiness, happy life, inner peace, love, positive reinforcement, self improvement, self perception | Comment (0)Separate or Connected?
In the Tao Te Ching there is a short part of one of the verses that reflects well how the world at large sees itself as separate from everyone else. It says the following;
All the world says,
“I am important;
I am separate from all the world.
I am important because I am separate,
Were I the same, I could never be important.”
This is a very general misconception that we often have as we look at ourselves and the world around us. The temptation is always there to see ourselves as separate from one another, and that the more we distinguish, or separate, ourselves from those around us, the more important we become. This is one of the great reasons behind much of the strife we encounter as we go through life.
Going through your days seeing yourself as separate from each person you encounter only distances you from that person, and until we can see that we are all one, we have little hope of solving the issues that the world now faces. This is at the core of the philosophy that I am sharing, while indeed happiness is found inside of you, it is also found inside each person you come in contact with. When we approach life seeing ourselves as connected to all people there is a very positive energy that comes with. Conversely if we see ourselves as separate from the world then each encounter we have with another individual will negatively impact both ourselves and the other person.
For example when we are driving along the highway, we often by default revert to seeing ourselves as separate from all the other people driving along the same road, and in seeing ourselves as separate we often enter into ridiculous little contest with other motorists, trivial things like pacing just ahead of the car next to you, or driving too close to the bumper of the car ahead of you because you feel he is not going fast enough. This is not something you would do if you were walking down the street, you would feel ridiculous indeed walking closely behind another person because you feel they are not walking fast enough. The reason that we behave differently when walking than we do when driving is because when we are walking we tend to see the other person as an individual, another human walking along, and as we walk along we feel more connected to that person. When we drive it’s a whole different situation. Inside of each car is a person, but while driving most people don’t see the other person, they simply see a vehicle, and when all you see is an object you act with greater indifference to that object.
But the truth is that we are all connected, human life on this planet progresses at a rate relative to how closely humans see themselves as connected to other humans. In what history of western civilization calls the “Dark Ages” we see that human progress slowed to a near halt for centuries, this is because the societal system was based on the acquisition of power over other people, those in power simply saw their “subjects” as objects with which they achieved their own desires, this extended from politics to religion and all avenues in between. In a society based on the gain of dominion over others there is really no room for society at large to progress. This is exactly what happened during this struggle through history.
As soon as ideas started surfacing throughout the world that “all men are created equal” we started to see the collective human consciousness awake as if from a deep sleep and as we progressed further into such great causes as equal rights for women, and ultimately equal rights for all people regardless of their origins we have seen huge strides in the progression of things that add to the general welfare of society, you can follow along and see that as more and more human rights were recognized more and more technological advances were made and with greater speed than ever. The printing press as developed by Johannes Gutenberg in the middle part of the 1400’s remained relatively unchanged until the early part of the 1800’s at which point the automated printing press came into being. We can look at technological advances since that time and be absolutely spellbound at the speed and ease with which technology has impacted our lives.
We now find ourselves at a crossroads, increasingly we are being convinced that we live in a world of “us versus them” whether it be as a result of political strife within our own country or if it is nation against nation, or even someone trying to convince us that we need to hate another group because they think differently than we do. This information is all around us and seems to be getting more and more forceful in its approach. We need to start turning off the voices out there that tell us that we are separate. We need to recognize that simply because we have ideological differences there is no reason that we must be enemies. Possibly the worst attitude to have is that “if you are not with me you are against me.” This is not true, the reality is that we are all together; we are all pieces of a great puzzle that in order to be complete requires all of us. The Dalai Lama is said to have stated that if every child on the planet meditated on compassion for others for just one hour a week that the world could, in a single generation, eradicate all of the societal plagues that torment our society. Can you imagine? One generation has the capability to put an end to worldwide hunger, and sickness, and most importantly war.
Remember to stay connected to those around you, treat everyone with the respect and love that you desire to be treated with. Let’s see if we can help raise the collective consciousness of the entire world, and who knows what kind of great strides will be made if we are able to not focus on our differences, but focus on the common goal. After all I think almost everybody in the world wants the same thing, peace and happiness in their own lives. And we can accomplish this by making sure that we are a source of peace and happiness, and not a source of hate and unrest.
Filed under Self Improvement and Mastery | Tags: contentment, enthusiasm, happiness, happy life, inner peace, long term success, love, self improvement | Comment (0)Finding The Loophole
I have written previously about what I consider to be spiritual laws, or in other words, laws that directly involve the growth of your spirit. Examples of these sorts of laws include love, gratitude, forgiveness, and patience. These are all easy enough to understand. I have recently been studying the New Testament, and an interesting trend comes around, and it’s a trend that continues to this day. It’s what I call “finding the loophole.”
For example when Jesus teaches that we should forgive all men, the disciples ask , “but how many times?” they even offer up what they consider to be a large number, seven. They missed the initial lesson and law because generally when we hear that something is required of us we automatically, even before we have “disobeyed” the law, we automatically try and find the loophole, or the situation in which it is unnecessary to live the law. To be truly happy and at peace we need to change the questions we ask, here are 4 spiritual laws that bring us greater happiness, I will write the common response and what might just be a beter question to ask that will bring us greater happiness.
The Law Of Love- “Love Thy Neighbor As Thyself”
Natural Response- “But what if my neighbor offends me?”
Response For Happiness- “How can I find ways to show love for my neighbor regardless of how they treat me?”
The Law Of Gratitude- “Be Grateful In All Things”
Natural Response- “I don’t have much to be grateful for, my life is a mess.”
Response For Happiness- ” I am grateful to be alive, I am grateful for my trials because they strengthen me.”
The Law Of Forgiveness- “Of You It Is Required To Forgive All Men”
Natural Response- “How many times before I can stop forgiving?”
Response For Happiness- “It is through forgiving that we are forgiven. I Accept.”
The Law Of Patience- “And whosoever shall compel thee to go a mile, go with him twain.”
Natural Response- “When will it end?”
Response For Happiness- “What can I learn?”
These are all relatively short answers but in the coming weeks I will address each of these laws and how we can go about living them more fully, until then remember that happiness is not something you chase, it is not something outside of you. You are happiness, and happiness is you.
Keith
Filed under Self Improvement and Mastery | Tags: contentment, enthusiasm, forgiveness, get happy now, gratitude, happiness, happy life, inner peace, love, patience, self improvement, self perception | Comment (1)Happiness Factor: Detaching From The Outcome
In the Bhagavad-Gita there exists an abundance of incredible information. As I was reading through it this morning I was struck by a passage that encapsulates so beautifully another way in which we can encounter peace. In Chapter 2 Krishna says to Arjuna, “Perform your duty equipoised, O Arjuna, abandoning all attachment to success or failure…” This short phrase is so very telling in both its depth and simplicity in that the only way to truly be fulfilled is through detaching yourself from the outcome of the activity in which you are engaged and perform that activity simply out of love.
One of the main causes for many people being unhappy is that they are dissatisfied with the condition in which they find themselves, they are unhappy with their job, or their relationships, or their physical appearance, the list can go on and on for centuries. The central theme is that people find themselves dissatisfied with the outcome they have achieved, but to me the root of the problem is that they have set up a certain expectation for themselves, and if that expectation is not met most people choose to go down a self destructive path. This is how most people end up being defined as “failures.” An interesting thing to note is that you are never a failure until you label yourself as such, if someone else labels you a failure it means nothing! But that is something we will get into another day.
But if we just set about at life, and live each moment as though it were the only moment we have (which it is), and put all of our very best energy into doing whatever it is that we are doing at that moment without concentrating on what will happen when it’s complete, or who will or will not be impressed by what we have accomplished we will find a whole new avenue of gratification opening up, we find that our abilities reach far beyond whatever our prior limitations were and discover whole new heights to which we can soar.
Oft times when we attempt to detach ourselves from the outcome we expect that in detaching ourselves from the outcome that the most favorable outcome will magically appear at all times, and when it doesn’t happen that way we become upset and fall back into old patterns of thinking. In reality we never left those old patterns of thought behind, we were attempting to detach only to try and achieve a particular result, but that’s not detachment, that’s delusion.
When we truly detach from the outcome we find that it does not matter what the result is, if we are going through life with enjoyment, and love, and satisfaction in what we do (trust me, you can be satisfied in what you currently do, in at least some way) we then discover that life is its own reward, and that it may not be that we will inherit all the riches of the world, or we may not inherit the perfect job, but when we live life to the fullest every day, without expecting anything in return we increase the amount of peace in our lives, I’m not saying resign yourself to your current position and stay there, not at all. I am saying when you have no attachment to the outcome you are not disappointed, you accept what has happened and move forward with your planned objectives instead of letting yourself become stopped by unfavorable circumstances.
Essentially we are looking again for peace, and as the Gita says, “how can there be any happiness without peace?”
Be peaceful, live your life to the fullest every day and separate yourself from the outcome, this is a surefire way to move ahead in your own self development.
Filed under Uncategorized | Tags: contentment, enthusiasm, get happy now, happiness, happy life, inner peace, long term success, love, self improvement | Comments (5)Start from the inside
Take a look around you, look out a window if you can. Pay attention to all the things going on around you, look at the cars , the trees, maybe look at your child, who is vying for your attention in an unpleasant way. Look at these things, and read the following statement, “None of what you see is what determines your happiness”
None of it, happiness does not come from the things around you, it does not come from money, or well behaved children, or spare time, or a new boat, happiness does not come from any of these things, but our happiness is often determined by how we feel about these things, which is a whole different story altogether.
You may say, that it’s not true, how can I be happy if this or that is going on in the world? My question to you is, how would you feel if you did not know about it? You see whatever it is would still be happening, but your awareness would be different, so we can see, that the external event is not what makes us happy or unhappy, but it’s how we process that event.
Really stop and think about this, everything that we feel is a result of how we process the world around us, it is not a result of the world around us, when we decide to let the world be the world, and to control our own destiny, then we are able to make great strides, expecting the world to change to match your beliefs will never frustrate the world, but it will frustrate you.
It’s a very simple thing to control our thoughts, it’s not terribly easy, but it is very simple.
Filed under Self Improvement and Mastery | Tags: contentment, enthusiasm, get happy now, happiness, happy life, inner peace, long term success, love, positive reinforcement, self improvement | Comment (0)Get Happy Now! How enthusiasm can change your life.
Do you remember when you were just a small child? Of course you do, we all do, but what do you remember the most? For many of us the most vivid memories we have are from the times that we did something that we were excited about, like our first trip to Disneyland, or even the first time our parents took us out to eat. There’s a reason that these memories stand out in such a vibrant way, and that is because our memories are stronger when the emotion we attached to that memory is strong. (this is also the reason that negative memories are so vivid as well, but we can talk about that another time)
So what makes enthusiasm so powerful? Why does it stick with us when so few things do? Enthusiasm is one of the highest levels of euphoria that we know of, when we are enthused about something we are not merely excited, it’s almost as though our whole body tingles with expectation. These are the times when you feel like you can’t wait a minute more. And the best part is when we are enthused about something we are never let down, it may not be exactly what we thought it would be, but the electricity we feel about it carries us through to almost always having a positive result.
How can we use enthusiasm to get happy now? It’s not difficult, we simply tap into our memories of enthusiasm and attach those same feelings to everyday situations, you may not feel as enthusiastic about doing a presentation for work, but maybe you can set up a reward for yourself when the presentation is complete, and get excited about the presentation because the reward awaits you at the end of the experience.
You could also simply just choose to be enthusiastic about life, and be grateful for every day you have, I heard a quote once from somebody that said “a good day is one where I am on 2 feet above the ground instead of lying beneath it.” That too is something we can be excited about today is a day to live life.
Another easy way to use enthusiasm to better our lives is to share it, and the simplest way to share it is through a smile, next time you “accidentally” make eye contact with someone while driving, or walking down the street, or in the grocery store, instead of looking away with embarrassment, flash them a quick smile, it will help you get happy, and it will more than likely get you a smile which means you just helped someone else become happy as well.
Give it a shot you have nothing to lose, infuse your life with some enthusiasm and see what happens.
Filed under Self Improvement and Mastery | Tags: contentment, enthusiasm, get happy now, happiness, happy life, love, peace, positive reinforcement, self improvement, smile | Comment (0)